December 10, 2007 at 9:18 am
· Filed under Bits, essays, life lessons
This time of year is always full of mixed feelings. Don’t get me wrong - I am about the most Christmas-spirited person there is. I love decorating. I love singing ye olde carols. I love crafting gifts, buying gifts - the whole process of really thinking about someone and trying to come up with something (you can afford) which will tickle their fancy. I love visiting with people. I love the time off work. I even love preparing for company and having a cookie party. The mixed feelings come in because of the pressures - pressure to get things done, to fit in extra activities, to spend money, to have the house more presentable than usual, etc.
Cards: I have a huge extended family on my mother’s side. She was one of six children. I love every one of them. I don’t want to leave anyone out. But I decided a few years ago that the cutoff had to be three generations. (ie I give to my grandparents, parents/aunts/uncles, and cousins. I don’t give to my cousin’s children, grandma’s aunt, etc.) Once I add in my husband’s family, a few friends, and my coworkers, I end up with about 50 people to make cards for. Plus, Alex has about 75 customers. That’s a lot of cards, whether you buy them or make them. I like making them, and on years when the budget is low - like this year - I make them.
Cookies & Birthdays: My DH asked me last night why I insist on having a cookie party. It started a few years ago when I discovered his mother’s aunt had a December birthday the day before mine, and that neither of us had had a birthday party in, like, years. So I decided that if no one would throw us a party, I’d throw a party. And since I love making cookies this time of year to give as gifts, but have trouble finding time to make them, I’d make it a cookie-baking party. It’s a fun time for women of all ages to squeeze into my little kitchen/dining room for a few hours of chatter and emerge with cookies to justify their time. I’m there making the cookies anyway. I might as well have someone to talk to, which is really what every woman wants most.
Work: It’s also a tough time at work. It’s a time when a lot of projects get finished up. That’s awesome. But it’s also a time when anything that can’t be wrapped up before the holiday gets pushed aside. That’s a bummer. The closer you get to the holidays, the emptier the work plate becomes. I’ve just completed a rollout of a DEMO of Instant Messaging for my employer. (Lotus Sametime running with our other Domino/Lotus Notes servers. It’s awesome. We’re loving it. For the users, it was like “set your password and away you go”. There was more prep work on my end than that, but overall not too bad. A little more than, say, the email-to-fax or enabling ldap or something. ) However, there are a handful of things that are making no progress whatsoever, and that’s too bad.
UPDATE: It looks like I’m not the only one who has projects get pushed off until after the holidays:
Atlantis to Launch No Earlier Than Sunday
Dec 07, 2007 05:00:00 GMT
Targeted launch time is 3:21 p.m. EST.
Atlantis to Launch Sunday
Dec 08, 2007 05:00:00 GMT
Shuttle will take the European Columbus lab to the space station.
NASA Postpones Shuttle Atlantis Launch
Dec 09, 2007 05:00:00 GMT
NASA delayed Sunday’s scheduled launch of space shuttle Atlantis after a failure occurred in a fuel sensor system.
NASA Targets Space Shuttle Atlantis Launch on Jan. 2
Dec 09, 2007 05:00:00 GMT
Space shuttle Atlantis’ STS-122 mission to the ISS now is targeted to launch no earlier than Jan. 2 from NASA’s Kennedy Space Center.
Gifts: Like I said, I LOVE giving gifts. But, you always wish you had a little more time or money so you could give the “perfect” thing. I’ve got a few people who will probably get their ‘perfect thing’ next year, and their ‘good but not perfect’ thing this year, because of budgetary constraints…and time constraints. I’m a very thrifty shopper and a creative thinker and a crafter. I have to think that makes budgeting easier. But it makes actual gifting more challenging! I know someone who can give a really cute set of tea towels or really nice expensive wool socks, and be happy with that. Not me. If I gave tea towels, I’d have to embroider them myself with your name or your favorite animal/symbol/saying, and wrap them on a tea tray with a pretty mug and bags of your favorite tea. If I give wool socks, it’ll probably be because I learned how to knit, or because they’re in a gift basket with a foot massager and lotion - but only because if said your feet were really bothering you lately, or because they were on your list.
But don’t go thinking that my perfectionist tendencies are the problem. I’ve learned from Flylady.net that I have to accept “done good enough” sometimes over “not done because it wasn’t good enough”. If you can’t tell that from the above, you should know that there are tons of other things I’d like to do around Christmas that I don’t. I’d like to be in a choir again, like I was in school. I’d like to take the kids caroling from the back of a hay truck. (They’d hate it.) I’d like to put on a Christmas pageant. I’d like to have something really awesome to give to my DH, who is getting to that stage of fatherhood where he says not to get him anything because if he needed it, he’d buy it himself. And I’d like to do something really special to acknowledge or help so many others… And that’s just the list of things I think that I actually COULD pull off, if I really had my act together. In my dream world, there’s also plenty of time and money to give something modest but special to the mailman and my coworkers and DH’s customers. I’d like to make really awesome quilts to give as presents. Plus spend time sipping cocoa in front of the woodstove with a good book while snow falls with a feeling of peace because everything got done. Ummm…that would be nice. But it’ll have to wait until January.
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December 7, 2007 at 2:20 pm
· Filed under essays, precious
I’m so glad I went out at lunchtime.
I called and checked in with my husband. He said “You know it’s snowing really bad right now. It’ll probably be slippery.” But, I had to go down to the thrift store to see if I could pick up some (undisclosed supplies) so I can work on the (undisclosed gifts) I am hoping to finish up this weekend. Besides, it was all main roads with 25mph speed limits between here and there, so I knew I’d be Ok - and I was fine. I found the things which I think will work, plus a few other things. But here’s why I’m glad I ventured out over my lunch hour:
* A snowflake landed on my eyelash before I could get into the car.
* Big fluffy flakes that make everything seem silent and peaceful.
* Stopping at a stop light, I looked at a big brick building and saw the white fluffy flakes silhoutted against the brick. Why do they seem random, yet patterned, at the same time? And they were so big and slow that you could watch an individual flake go from the top of the building to the ground.
* Driving along, the big flakes coming towards my windshield seemed like perfect miniatures of the paper ones we made as children.
* At the next light, I focused my eyes on my windshield, and was treated to hundreds of little crystal asterisks appearing and then melting.
I know why people complain about the cold and ice and such. But I’m SO glad I was able to appreciate the beauty of today’s snow.
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December 5, 2007 at 11:16 am
· Filed under books, quotes
“The price of discipline is always less than the pain of regret” - Unknown
“If evil be said of thee, and if it be true, correct thyself; if it be a lie, laugh at it.” - Epictetus
“When we judge or criticize another person, it says nothing about that person; it merely says something about our own need to be critical.” - Unknown
“Constant kindness can accomplish much. As the sun makes ice melt, kindness causes misunderstanding, mistrust and hostility to evaporate.” - Albert Schweitzer
Albert Einstein: “The secret to creativity is knowing how to hide your sources.”
• When we rationalize things we tend to cut ourselves slack and lean towards the option with the least effort.
• The more excuses I make the more tedious it gets, the less polished my skills.
- Baron VC , http://baron.vc/things-that-running-teaches-you-about-life
Everytime money changes hands, the Government gets a little piece of it. In theory, if money changes hands often enough, THE GOVERNMENT GETS ALL OF IT!! -Anonymous
Recent good-looking books from Gutenberg:
A Martian Odyssey by Stanley Grauman Weinbaum > http://www.gutenberg.org/etext/23731
They had some Shakespeare and DH Lawrence up recently, too, but I didn’t save the links. Check it out at http://www.gutenberg.org/
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December 5, 2007 at 11:13 am
· Filed under Bits
OK, so it’s been awhile. Well, family comes first, and the holidays are fast approaching. I keep saying “I ought to blog something”, and I keep putting it off because other things are keeping me busy. Besides, after spending literally the whole day on computers, I don’t have much drive to look at a screen when I get home. At least, not beyond checking my email and balancing my checkbook.
Things I’ve been busy with:
A certain little boy had some medical testing. Fortunately it showed there was no medical explanation for his memory issues. (MRI brain normal, full blood workup normal.) The doctor said to consider him as “a variation of normal”. He said don’t worry as long as he’s performing well in school, not having behavioral problems, and not having memory issues which endanger him or anyone else. It’s funny, the disconnect between the medical and educational systems. Because of how funding works, the educational system wants to label anyone who is different as learning disabled. In fact, a teacher I spoke to recently said almost every student is signed up for some type of learning support, and there’s no longer a stigma associated with it. However, from a medical point of view, there is nothing wrong with the child. Hmmm.
The Thanksgiving Holiday came and went. We attended a community Thanksgiving feast that my MIL’s church particpiates in. The mayor attends. Several of my MIL’s odler friends attend. A few years ago, my MIL decided she’d rather do that than throw a big shindig. It is decidedly easier - and they do send you home with leftovers. But for me, it falls short of being celebratory. You just don’t get that hanging out time and that special stress time. I dunno. I might suggest that next year we host something ourselves. I’m not one who wants to do a big turkey in the oven, but I’ve discovered that a few legs and breats in the 5qt crockpot are perfect.
Cleaning and decorating for the Holidays.
Snow, cold, and the result that kids stay in the house constantly. (Not enough snow to be fun.)
Setting up a crafting space in the basement. This involved moving the freezer, and moving my supply “cabinet” from upstairs to downstairs. I also gathered various supplies from all over the house and took them down there. And I will probably move my sewing machine down there. If I can’t move the whole thing, I’ll unscrew it from the cabinet and just take the machine.
DIY Christmas Cards - This is a tradition I thoroughly enjoy, but am alone in creating. The boys used to help, but they’ve grown out of it. Alex likes the idea that we put a personal touch on our cards, but he’s not interested in helping either. This year I’ve got 78 customers and about 50 friends/family to make cards for. Each year it is a challenge to come up with a design that is simple and inexpensive enough to make enmasse, but still attractive. It should look “hand-crafted” but not cheesy.
Card lists, wish lists, gift lists, gift crafting/sewing projects, shopping, making things.
Shadow and the vet. Shadow is our 15 year old cat. He’s had a behavioral problem with the litter box for a few years, but we’d been dealing with it. More specifically, I’d been mopping urine up from beside the litterbox every morning. He was to the vet a few years ago, and they determined he didn’t have a urinary tract problem. He had a heart murmur, but there really wasn’t much they could do about that. They tried to give him antibiotics anyway, but that made him sicker, so we gave up. I’ve tried various things - extra boxes, different litters, moving boxes around, different foods, etc. Nothing helped. Then a few weeks ago he peed on the office chair and the futon. OK, at that point he crossed the line from quirky to BAD KITTY. He went into the cat carrier with a tiny litterbox and towel, and I made a vet appt for last Saturday. The tests and appointment were $225. The results came back. The good news is there’s no urinary, kidney, liver, or other problem identified with the exception of being anemic. (Apparently, kitties that don’t feel well express themselves by peeing whereever they feel like peeing.) The bad news is, that means they want to do more testing to determine the cause of the anemia. In kitties, anemia isn’t an iron deficiency, but a symptom of some other disease - one website said there are about 75 possibilities. Our doctor wants to start with Feline Lukemia/HIV tests, another blood test, and xrays. That’s another $150. Meanwhile, back at the home front, Shadow has been happily going in his litterbox in his carrier, or in the basement box if we take him down there. Of course, he doesn’t have a chance to pee anywhere else, because he only gets out of his box if he’s supervised. If this continues, we might get the behavioral problem licked, in which case I don’t know if we’ll pursue much medically…15 for a cat is like 92 for a human…really, if he’s not in pain now, I don’t know how much stress/pain I’d want to put him through to solve the anemia which isn’t bothering him.
Hubby and the great mouth guard caper.About a month ago, he started grinding his teeth in his sleep. It didn’t wake him up, but it woke me up. It sounded like a blender full of ice going off beside my ear. He also ended up with some jaw pain. He went to the dentist, who took a mold to make a ceramic mouth guard that clips in for him to wear while he sleeps - it is sort of like a retainer. It is supposed to keep the teeth in such a position that you don’t do the grinding. The problem is, they apparently weren’t made for guys with a jaw that shuts like a crocodile. He keeps breaking it - literally shattering it. They keep made a new one. He bit on it during the fitting, and it cracked. They ground off the cracked part and fit it again. He bit down, and it shattered. I keep telling him he needs to just buy a football or boxing mouth guard and be done with it. He goes back today.
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November 20, 2007 at 6:50 pm
· Filed under Bits, space
So, have you heard they’re making a new Star Trek movie with an ENTIRELY new cast? This is one of those things that is bound to go badly, but in such a way that we’ll all be inexplicably drawn to watch. So, to summarize what I’ve read of the staffing plans thus far, I’ve created this quicky little piece of cut-and-paste:
- William Shatner is replaced by Chris Pine - Capt. James T. Kirk
- Leonard Nimoy is replaced by Zachary Quinto - Spock
- DeForest Kelley is replaced by Karl Urban - “Bones” McCoy, Chief Medical Officer
- James Doohan is replaced by Simon Pegg - Scotty, Chief Engineer…and yes, I HAD to use the “Shawn of the Dead” face.
- Nichelle Nichols , Zoe Saldana - Uhura, Communications
- George Takei, John Cho - Sulu, Helmsman
- Walter Koenig, Anton Yelchin - Chekov
In case you don’t recognize most of these names (I didn’t), look them up on imdb.org…you’ll recognize the movies they’ve been in. Once I did that, I began to wonder just how well these personalities would mesh. But then, all the “original” cast members seem like pretty big personalities, and they somehow made it work. The real question for me is if it will try to be “campy”, or serious sci-fi. I’m on the fence about which way I would WANT to see it go. If it goes serious and fails, I’d be hugely disappointed. But, if it goes campy to the point of being really stupid, I’d be disappointed as well. Both directions require serious attention to detail to succeed. It’ll be…interesting…
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November 19, 2007 at 2:02 pm
· Filed under essays, life lessons
In response to some recent articles I’ve seen, and thinking about some people around us who might could use some advice now and in the future, I present the rules of marriage. Life isn’t fair. This isn’t the 1950s with the woman as a slave/homemaker getting the man’s slippers. But, if you subscribe to the modernist thought that things are 50/50 you’re bound to be disappointed. You’ll be keeping score and constantly coming up short - and so will your partner. That’s because to me, running the vacuum is an awful chore that rates at least a -10, but to my husband the least I could do is run the vacuum and it rates about -1. I’m willing to do cat litter and laundry every day if I can get someone else to vacuum. On the other hand, when it comes time to remodel, I’ll paint every surface of the house, and my husband can’t stand painting. Neither of us like to balance checkbooks and pay bills, but I’m the least likely to freak out while doing so, so it became my job. The first year (or 7) of your marriage will be spent figuring out what ranks highest on each other’s “pain scale”, and dividing up the chore list in a way that works. Don’t get it into your head that things will be fair. Instead, work out a balance that you can both live with.Decide what is important to you. Do you plan on having children? Dogs? Living in the city or country? Driving new or used cars? What kinds of vacations and how often and with whom. What to do with your free time. (Do you like to spend time at home, or will you fill every evening coaching little league, playing bball with the guys, and stopping a tthe bar on your way home?) What you are, and are not, willing to do to finance all these plans. I’m not talking dreams about your life, but what scenarios would NOT work for you? It is unlikely everything will go according to your plan. However, if you know what you REALLY want, you can take steps to work towards it. And what you really DON’T want, you can take evasive action. But, more importantly, if you find out that your fondest plan is your spouse’s worst nightmare, you can draft a new plan that you both can live with. You wouldn’t want to find that out AFTER you bought the dog/crib/condo, right?Use your own yardstick. Don’t measure your relationship against someone else’s. What works for you, works. Don’t worry if it is not what works for someone else. My MIL and FIL are joined at the hip. They have even been known to dress alike. While I think that’s all cute, and sometimes I think I’d like that, I admit that I’d lose some respect for my DH if he allowed me to dress him. And that he’d drive me crazy if we spent EVERY night in each other’s company. It doesn’t mean that our relationship isn’t as good as theirs. We’re just different. The same goes for cleaning, finances, yardwork, children, etc.Familes have their own culture. I’ve heard that in certain cultures, pointing your index finger at someone is similar to what we mean when we point our middle finger in the air. It’s a cultural difference that you better learn if you don’t want to look like a jerk. Similarly, families have “cultures” of their own. Your wife’s family had a certain way they celebrated Christmas when she was growing up, certain things they did on Sunday afternoons, certain “inside jokes”, and even certain blind spots to certain family member’s problems. Your family has their fair share of these things too. Some of these will be obvious, and others won’t. Try to figure out what are the important traditions and touchy hotspots, and treat them appropriately. Even if you don’t know going into things what these are, if you know to look for them, you’re better off. It’s kind of like if you forget what fork to use at a fancy dinner, so you watch to see what everyone else does. If you’re ever confused, or offended by something, look to your spouse as an interpreter. Treat times with your wife’s family like that, and you won’t go wrong.
It is NOT all about you. Your husband’s bad mood might be a sugar low, or an argument with a friend. Your wife is supposed to spend 99.9% of her time with the new baby.When your wife visits her family, it is not to take a vacation with you. Your kids are supposed to get all the presents at Christmas and birthdays, and you’re lucky if they remember yours. On days that you resent these changes, remember that your spouse feels the same way. Do what you can to change it, and someday they’ll return the favor.
It IS all about you (plural). Gone are the days when what you did only affected you, and only reflected on you. If you leave dirty socks on your bedroom floor, you’ve essentially just tossed a dirty sock onto your wife’s bedroom floor. You wouldn’t have done that when you were dating, would you? If you fail to open the door for your wife, you aren’t just being lazy, you’re showing her friends that she has a thoughtless husband. Likewise, wives, if he goes to work dressed badly because you didn’t have the laundry done, it reflects poorly on both of you. Did you ever work one of those jobs where they said “remember that when you’re wearing our uniform, you’re representing our company”? Well, 24/7 you are representing your family, so don’t do anything that wouldn’t represent well. But more importantly, remember that what you do or say reflects how you feel about your spouse.
Be honest, but be flexible. Tell your spouse when something bothers you. But be able to get over the little things. Recognize the things that are important to his heart, his sanity, his self esteem. Find ways to allow him to have those things without crushing yours. Find ways to let him know what’s bothering you that acknowledge the fact that YOU are the one feeling insecure/inadequate.
And Finally…
The grass is not greener elsewhere - you just aren’t seeing it as closely. It’s so easy when you’re having trouble making things work to think that things would be better with someone else, or even by yourself. But it isn’t true. Here are some reasons why:
- If there were things you didn’t know about your spouse that now make you dislike him, don’t you think the same might be true of others? Even if you make sure you don’t have the SAME blind spot, you’ll probably find out you overlooked something else.
- Separation is just adding to the problems, not subtracting from them. Once you are married (and especially if you have children), you will always have a relationship with that person. If you separate and take up with someone else, you now have TWO relationships/families to deal with. NOT easier. Just different problems. Are you SURE the problems you are having now are bad enough that you want to make your life that much more complicated? Remember, you’ll still have to deal with your “X”, you just won’t have to live with him/her, and the bargaining chips will be different. Even if you separate just to be “by yourself” for a while, and end up back together, it will always be a sore spot between you. Better to spend the time hashing things out, if possible.
- It takes two people to have an argument. You were one of those people, and no matter where you go you will still be you. Take a good look at yourself and see if perhaps you aren’t the problem - or at least part of it.
- You’ve gotten this far. There are already a lot of things you’ve found out, worked out, shared, and worked through. Do you really want to throw all that away? Do you really want to go through all that again with someone else?
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November 13, 2007 at 4:31 pm
· Filed under Bits
http://www.theregister.co.uk/2007/11/13/hilton_elephant_appeal/
No, it isn’t a joke…but it is pretty funny!
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November 13, 2007 at 4:30 pm
· Filed under Bits
http://www.theregister.co.uk/2007/11/08/top_movie_quotes/comments/#c_92672
So, what are your “most used” movie quotes? The ones that immediately come to mind for me, in no particular order, are:
- I’ll be back (of course) - Terminator
- “We’ve got cows.” “There’s another cow.” “I think that was the same cow.” - Twister (I guess this only happens when you live with a future Storm Chaser.)
- “Surely sir, you can’t be serious!” “I am serious, and don’t call me Shirley” - Airplane (well, I don’t so much quote it as think it)
- “No soup for you.” Seinfeld (Ok, that’s a TV quote, but I’m sure it’s been referenced in a movie)
- “Watch out for that tree” - George of the Jungle
- “Kicking ass and taking names” - (what movie IS that from?)
- “ET Phone home” - ET
- “I like chaaaahklate milk” - Cheese, Foster’s Home for Imaginary Friends (another TV quote)
- Hellooo, McFly…. - Back to the Future
- Anyone? Anyone? - Ferris Bueller’s Day Off
I’m sure there are others we use more frequently, both movie and TV, but those were the things that came to mind.
Can you add to my list?
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November 7, 2007 at 1:18 pm
· Filed under Uncategorized
Finland school shooting linked to YouTube
http://rss.cnn.com/~r/rss/cnn_topstories/~3/181053213/index.html
So, what kind of crappy inflamatory headline is that? Apparently, he planned the act and posted it as a warning on Youtube.
So, CCN is saying that if he had written out the warning on, say, lined school paper…then their headline would read “School shooting linked to Mead Paper Supply” ??
Not that I’ve ever had much trust in popular media, but I am seriously starting to doubt their ability to report on ANYthing without putting some type of slant on it.
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November 7, 2007 at 1:18 pm
· Filed under Uncategorized
Disclaimer: I have an unhealthy interest in reading complex case studies that might put others to sleep.
You may NOT wish to follow the link below to read “Identity Fraud Trends and Patterns: Building a Data-Based Foundation for Proactive Enforcement,” October 2007.
http://www.utica.edu/academic/institutes/ecii/publications/media/cimip_id_theft_study_oct_22_noon.pdf
For those who do not follow the link, who fell asleep reading the study, or who would rather read a summary, here are the things I felt were important to note:
In about 20% of the cases, the offenders used the Internet in some manner (take totals from page 49)
If you read further into the study, this is ANY use of the itnernet - this doesn’t indicate that the theft was of information provided over the itnernet - this number includes use of information obtained elsewhere in an application or purchase made online.
So, for those of you who are afraid to bank or shop online because of identity theft, you need to realize that more identity theft happens offline than online.
This percentage is on par with the percentage which occurred through a family member, which was actually quite rare.
You are far more likely to have your information stolen through a business (50%) or your employer (30%).
Employee insiders were the offenders in one-third of the 517 cases
This goes back to the old analogy we used to use when online shopping was new. You give your credit card to the waitress, (who makes minimum wage or less). She takes it to the back room to complete the transaction. Who knows what happens when it is out of your view? How is this more trustworthy than online shopping?
In about a fifth of the cases, the employee worked in the financial services industry
1 out of 5 cases are someone who works at a bank…the very place we MOST trust with our money, and the people who have ALL the data and forms to take out a credit card in our name. Great!
The top 3 most prevalent types of cases involved Fraudulent Use of Account Numbers, Fraudulent Access Device Applications, Stolen Bank Issued Cards
Protect your bank account and credit cards first.
The case analysis indicates that the offenders could be separated into two groups: those who engaged in identity theft practices as isolated events as opportunities presented themselves and those who actively pursue identity theft
The take-away here is to make sure your personal data doesn’t “present an opportunity”, when that is under your control. i.e. When you have temporary workers in your home, or when you are on vacation, do not leave important data such as SSN, account numbers, and drivers licenses where others can find them. If you are a business owner, temporary workers should be employed in areas which do not involve access to identity information.
And the top two take-away items:
Check your mail. Be observant about missing bills/statements, and bills from things you did not apply for.
Check your credit report. Report credit inquiries and accounts you did not open.
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